January 8, 2025
Peyten Williams, Bowbend Consulting
3 Principles to Make the Most of Your Parent Events
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if your school’s parents and families completely understood your mission and vision? If they supported teachers, the administration, and the advancement fund? If they not only showed up for parent events, but also encouraged other mission-fit families to apply because they couldn’t say enough about your fabulous school?
I believe it’s possible. But, if you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll get the results you’ve always had. Perhaps it’s time to rethink the parent engagement processes at your school, keeping at the top of mind your audience.
The Independent School Customer
While independent schools serve children, parents are the decision-makers and, thus, are your primary audience. Today’s parents differ from those in the past in many ways, including parenting styles, decision-making, and wants and needs for their children. To address this varied audience, it’s important to get to know your clients.
GenX Parents: Balance and Participation
School leaders complain that parents aren’t showing up like they used to (pre-COVID) at parent events. If this is true for your school, it might be a question of not understanding the preferences of your current audience.
Gen Xers, the parents of many of our upper school students, are motivated by “work-life balance. And they are resistant to change at work if it affects their personal lives” (Wilson 2024).
This generation, born between 1965 and 1980, is all about efficiency and innovation: “55% of startup founders are Gen Xers” (Wilson 2024). They’re the “Don’t waste my time, let’s do something interesting” generation.
Gen X wants their leaders to be ready to jump in to help solve problems, to be easily approachable, and to create a workplace where all levels can participate. This generation is looking to participate, not just “sit and get.”
Millennial Parents: Loyalty and Transaction
Another piece of feedback I hear is that parents have become “transactional.” Consider, however, that schools ask a lot of parents and don’t always give directly back. We ask parents to volunteer or write a big check. We ask parents to attend coffee sessions, with just a little social time, followed by sitting in rows and listening to an administrator talk for an hour. It’s little surprise, then, that parent interactions have become transactional. They want a service – their children’s education – and we’re providing that service but not much else.
Millennials, AKA the “Burnout Generation,” born between 1981-2000, want leaders to “connect diverse groups, [and] have their long-term personal interests at heart” (Wilson 2024). This generation is also the least loyal bunch to their employers: “More than a fifth of millennials in the workforce have switched jobs within 12 months, and 43% of millennials think they’ll switch jobs within the next two years” (Wilson 2024). If these parents are so willing to switch jobs, you can bet they’ll be willing to switch their children’s schools.
Zooming Towards The Horizon
Gen Z, the “Zoomers,” born between 2001-2020, for the most part, are not yet the parent population we’re serving, but it’s always wise to prepare. Zoomers are motivated by “diversity, personalization, individuality, and creativity.” Their communication style is through “social media, texts, and IM’s,” and they are keen on working where they can “learn new skills to advance their careers.” They want their leaders to be “empathetic mentors who are comfortable with mental health and work/life balance conversations”(Wilson 2024). (1)
The New Principles of Parent Programming
In order to reach these parent populations, schools must provide programming that is efficient, innovative, personalized, and skill-based. Here are three principles, along with some real-world application of these principles, that will increase the appeal of your school events.
Principle 1: In-person events should be primarily structured to foster connection.
Want to help Gen Xers know you’re not wasting their time? Want to gain the loyalty of millennials? Want to help Zoomers feel like you’ve personalized an event just for them? Give them time to connect and talk when they meet in person on your campus beyond the 15-minute pre-event coffee chat or parent social.
Your in-person events should be structured so that parents talk to each other and the leadership for at least half the event time, if not more. As we know from great teaching practice, the ones who are doing the talking are the ones who are doing the learning – let’s let these parents do the talking.
Parent engagement events at the Mount Vernon School in Atlanta, GA, and Saint Mary’s Episcopal Day School in Tampa, FL, put this principle into practice, firstly, by banishing the rows. For these events, parents arrived to encounter rooms filled with round tables – a crucial piece of the connection pie. Square tables or desks don’t quite create the same feeling of connectedness as a round table.
Next, these tables were “labeled” with different ages of children (eg. first grade, seventh grade, etc.), and parents were invited to sit at the table that matched the age of their oldest child. In this way, during the roundtable discussions – a large portion of the event – parents had a chance to connect with other families who were encountering similar issues and whose children were in the same grade. This small decision created a big impact for connection.
Finally, while there was some direct instruction happening, the events themselves primarily consisted of facilitated conversation between the parents. It’s hard not to feel engaged with and connected to a place where you built a deeper friendship or had a meaningful conversation.
Principle 2: Turn any event that could be a podcast into, well, a podcast.
If your event is designed to simply deliver information or spotlight a speaker lecture series, feel free to offer an in-person option, but don’t expect most people to attend. Instead, record the event on video or capture the audio, and share that event for asynchronous viewing or listening.
What a perfect way to tap into letting Millennials know that you’ve got their long-term interests at heart! You’ll also demonstrate how innovative and cutting-edge you are to your Gen Xers while respecting their time. As for those upcoming Zoomers, you’re communicating with them in the way they prefer – online. These events are the perfect places to share some key skills that Zoomers eat up!
While many schools now video record their in-person events to make the recordings available for those who cannot attend, podcasts are a growing media platform with which many parents engage.
The Lovett School, Atlanta, GA, has a podcast called Living Lovett, through which Chief Engagement Officer Jessica Sant bridges the school’s day-to-day execution of its mission, vision, and values for parents by telling “stories from the riverbank.” As the school sits adjacent to the Chattahoochee River, this title and delivery method bring both a warmth and personal connection to parents who aren’t physically on campus. Parents might be braving traffic on interstate I-285, but in their mind’s eye, they’re sitting next to Sant in a classroom overlooking the river, listening to how and why Lovett is going phone-free and how they might use some of the latest research in their parenting at home.
Similarly, The Westminster Schools, also in Atlanta, previously featured a weekly parent Zoom meeting with former Dean of the Lower School Dr. Becky McKnight. These 30-minute “Food for Thought” sessions covered a new parenting strategy for elementary school parents at noon every Thursday, just in time for parents to watch and listen while grabbing lunch. Parents had the opportunity to turn their videos on and engage with questions, type in the chat, or leave their videos off and watch the program. This flexible option gave parents a free, weekly parenting resource simply by being a member of the Westminster School community. (2)
Principle 3: Timing is everything.
When you host events in person, consider the impacts not just on your schedule, but also on those of your parents. Gen Xers don’t want you to waste their time. Millennials already have one foot out the door, so don’t make it harder for them to love you. Young Zoomer parents want everything personalized to their work-life balance, so why not make it easier on your parents?
Every school has half-days or partial days – when the students arrive at the usual start time in the morning but are then released a bit early. These days are the stuff of every parent’s nightmares! They sit in regular carpool, don’t have sufficient time to go anywhere or do anything, and then two hours later sit through carpool again.
Scotty Jones, middle school principal at the McCallie School in Chattanooga, TN, and his team figured out how to turn this frustrating situation into a well-timed parent engagement event. The event began right after morning drop-off, giving parents a chance to nosh on breakfast and coffee and mingle with other parents before the real event began.
About 40 middle and upper school parents showed up to the event – a big turnout! The event lasted the entire time students were in school that morning; then, parents could easily grab their children and walk to their cars, thereby avoiding a second carpool. The event was a smashing success, leaving parents feeling seen, heard, and catered to.
Most schools already host parenting events. Deans, counselors, heads and assistant heads are preparing slide shows, organizing room requests, and making sure the technology is set up. Incorporating these three principles for parent programming into your event planning won’t change the fact that you’ve still got to do these things, but they will change how you set up your room, what technology you require, and how you schedule your events. When we provide parent events that are catered to our audience, with efficiency, innovation, and personalization in mind, we’re taking steps toward improving our relationship with our main client – the parents.
Footnotes(1) For more on generations, consider the August 2024 SAIS Trend Tracker, where SAIS President Dr. Brett Jacobsen shares insights about the differences in the generations and the workforce.(2) Becky and Peyten cohost and continue to present “Food for Thought,” even after Becky’s retirement
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Peyten Williams is the founder of Bowbend Consulting, a company dedicated to inspiring and equipping parents and communities to raise thriving children of character. At Bowbend, Peyten offers parent coaching, workshops for parents and schools, consulting for schools, and professional development for teachers. With a commitment to education, child development, and researched best practices, Peyten brings a wealth of experience to her mission.
Peyten Williams, founder of Bowbend Consulting
